Friday, August 21, 2009

I HAD A DREAM

I dreamed that President BO woke up.

In my dream, President BO called a special, unscheduled press conference at which he promised to make a special announcement.
When the press conference began, President BO stepped to the dais and stood looking over the reporters present.

He spent a few uncomfortable moments looking first to the left and then to the right, moving his head slowly, almost roboticly.

There was, I thought, a small tear in his right eye.

Then he spoke.

His speech was uncharacteristically slow and deliberate.

His tone was sad.

He said, "Ladies and gentlemen, after much introspection and much consideration, and having witnessed the unparallelled reaction of the people of the United States of America to recent plans and proposals coming out of Washington, and having witnessed members of Congress demean and ridicule their constituents at Town Hall Meetings, going so far as to ignore the questioner in order to speak on the phone, and hearing them tell the voters in their districts that they would vote for an unpopular health care plan whether the voters liked it or not, I have decided that current efforts to wrest control of the health of Americans from their hands and to place it in the hands of the federal government is contrary to the Constitution, against the will of the people whom we serve, and not in the best interests of the country, should be laid aside. I am therefore recommending to congress that they withdraw consideration of a health care reform act at this time."

A great murmur flashed over the crowd and people who had never been called on for questions at one of these types of meetings held up their hands and were recognized by President BO.

"Did we understand you to say that you are backing off of your efforts to reform health care?"

"Yes." replied the President, "Given the wishes of the people, and recognizing that I have been much too arrogant, prideful and...yes, even bull headed about the health care issue, I am backing off of my efforts to reform health care."

"Mr. President!" The rich, sonorous voice was from a mature reporter who bore the scars of the war in which he had been embedded years ago. "Mr. President, I must say that in all of my years of reporting I have never had such esteem, pride and emotion about a decision by a sitting leader of the free world."

President BO spoke. "I want to apologize from the bottom of my heart for the consternation I have caused, the extreme expense I have gone to trying to pass this hellacious health care package. I am embarrassed that it ever came up and I promise that in the future I will only suggest legislation that will follow the dictates of the Constitution and will be in the best interest of the American people.

"I will embark on a course to encourage all students of every race to take advantage of the education offered to them, whether in private or public schools, to graduate from high school able to speak proper English and to engage in productive contributions to society, going on to learn a trade or to attend college, work hard and make something useful of themselves."

"I will never again try to perpetrate on the American people any form of political hoax, nor will I be anything but honest with them. I will answer questions from you and other members of the press directly, honestly and in language that will leave no doubt as to my meaning. I will no longer parse my words to make them seem like answers when they are not."

And then.....

And then.....

I woke up.

12 comments:

Z said...

OH, JOE...FANtastic post. WOULD that that would come to fruition!

Instead of THIS NIGHTMARE!! ARGH!!! :-) Let's keep praying that he DOES wake up!

Pasadena Closet Conservative said...

I hate morning.

Lone Ranger said...

I've NEVER had a dream THAT good -- not even the ones with Angie Dickinson in them! You sure you didn't die in your sleep for a few minutes and go to Heaven? Sleep apnea could do that.

ablur said...

I don't know how you survived the emotional swing a dream like that would have created. To go from heaven to hell that fast, I would have least had some neck muscle strains from the effect.

Wish it was true.

The Lib Basher said...

Good dream, I have nightmares about Obummer

Joe said...

Right now, I need a cup of coffee.

Dan said...

Did you really have this dream?

Joe said...

Dan: Being a conservative, and therefore committed to the truth at all times, no matter how much it hurts, I have to be candid and admit that I only daydreamed that I had that dream. But I have dreamed about having it.

Dan said...

You are a funny man. I'm glad to have found your blog.

David Wyatt said...

Wow. Bro. Joe I almost found myself having some respect for the man. I already do for the office, but I almost did for the man himself.......until you woke up!

Joe said...

Dan: Just remember, I may be funny, but looks aren't everything.

Wyatt: Yeah...I almost wish I had never awakened. Almost.

Susannah said...

That's more than a dream...it's fantasy!!! Oh, would that fantasies could become reality!

Dan, stick around. Joe's great!