Wednesday, October 8, 2008


Oh Joy!

Oh exultation!

We're saved, saved, SAVED!!!

Thank you Chris Dodd for encouraging us so much when you told us that Freddie Mac and Fannie Mae were sound!

Thank you Barney Frank for telling us that we had nothing to worry about with regard to the strength of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac!

And thank you! Thank you! Thank you! For leading us into a bailout of two entities that were sound and strong!

And let's not forget good ole AIG!

Thank you for taking $700,000,000,000.00 of government money and giving them the assistance they needed to cover the loans they made to people who were too poor to make monthly payments, let alone a down payment.

(By the way, oh revered leaders, how on earth did you manage to come up with that much money? You must be very industrious!)

We are awed! Awed, I say, awed!


What's that you say?

The stock market fell how much?

In one day?

But I thought...

I thought you said everything would be alright.

You DID say that didn't you?

Oh, please! Tell me you were telling us the truth when you promised to help the banks, the insurance companies and the big back-up companies.

Barney! Please tell us you've got it under control!

Barney, I've loved you for so long.

Why I used to watch you every day on TV, all decked out in purple and all.

You're what?

No, no...I didn't mean love you that way. I mean I loved to watch your program.


That wasn't you?

And here I thought the sweet, "I love you, you love me..." fairy tale had come to life.

We're going to need what?

We're going to need more money?

But I thought...I thought...

Where will you get more money?


The same place you got the last batch?

Barney...Chris...why are you chanting "tax-payers are suckers" under your breath?

I don't feel so good.

No comments: