Monday, January 3, 2011

PIGS FLY...BIRDS DON'T

Fed up with the bad economy, angry with President BO's socialist agenda and despondent over the price of gasoline at the pump, over 1,000 red winged blackbirds (and a few sympathetic starlings) committed suicide and fell to their death over Arkansas.

Look, it's as good an explanation as anyone else has come up with.

The first report scientists came up with blamed lightning.

A thousand birds hit by lightning...all of them red winged blackbirds?

Right.

One environmentalist group linked the death of the birds to man-made pesticides particulated in the atmosphere.

Only one species affected...right?

Right.

One very serious looking biologist said that it looked like some sort of disease phenomenon.

What a disease! It kicked in on a thousand birds at the same time, killing them in such a way that they fell in unity to the earth.

Right.

Arkansas Livestock and Poultry Commission ornithologist, Karen Rowe, speculated that high altitude hail might have been the cause.

Very selective hail, don't you think?

Given that it was the beginning of the new year, some suggested that the birds were traumatized by fire works.

Red winged black birds and starlings are sensitive about fire works...right?

Someone said that children's author, Judy Blume, might have suggested that a flock of flying pigs might have singled out red winged blackbirds in some sort of bird terrorist plot.

I don't think she actually said that.













In the final analysis, I like my explanation best.

12 comments:

tha malcontent said...

My guess it that it was from some Missal Defense System(or lack of it).
That caused their disorientation and was to blame for this mystery.
But I also guess that we will Never know the answer. And the governments explanations of this
(lightening or fireworks) was not very unconvincing.
Just my 2 cents.

Joe said...

the malcntent: I don't know. I heard that great flocks of rwbb and starlings had been seen frequenting Wal Mart pharmacies. They were probably picking up coumadin (used as a blood thinner and rat poison).

I think it was suicide.

Scotty said...

They haven't blamed the Republicans.....yet!

BuyWoWAccount said...

Haha! You got me with the trauma! LOL! Well what happened is kind of mysterious, whatever caused those birds death may they found out sooner.

Buy WoW Account

Trekkie4Ever said...

Actually, Jo, it was about 3,000. And if you haven't heard, over 100,000 drum fish were floating down the Arkansas River right after the dead birds.

I am blaming this catastrophe on either pesticides or someone did some illegal chemical dumping.

They need trace the migration of these birds and fish and find the source.

And quit blaming lightening and fireworks.

tha malcontent said...

Congressman John Boehner is elected
Speaker of the House of Representatives, succeeding Nancy Pelosi

Let the good times roll!

Joe said...

Scotty: They will...just wait.

BWWA: Welcome and I still say it was suicide.

Leticia: Yeah. They waited until I PRESSED THE "PUBLISH" button to raise the figure.

It just seems strange that only two species were involved.

the malcntent: Let's hope these guys stick to their guns.

Mark said...

Isn't this incident similar to one of the signs of the end of the age along with the seas turning to blood etc?

Fredd said...

Naw, you're all wrong. These birds kicked the bucket because the entire flock got caught in the backwash of Mike Huckabee's fleet of black helicopters. Mike dispatched the black choppers from Little Rock to protect the national Trilateral Commission convention, after his surprise showing in the 2012 GOP presidential polls. The TLC is a strong supporter of the Huckster, you see.

This is all strictly hush hush, though. Mum's the word...

Trekkie4Ever said...

lol!

Lone Ranger said...

Nothing makes me more homesick than the call of the red-winged blackbird.

Susannah said...

I heard it was George W. Bush's fault...