Tuesday, January 29, 2013


That's right. I have joined the ranks of those who wish to ban the most terrible weapon of all.

The specific weapon I want to ban has killed more people than 9 mm pistols, more people than 12 gauge shotguns, more people than AK 47s and, yes, more people than both atomic bombs dropped on Japan.

This weapon has killed people all over the world. It has killed people in Asia, in Africa, in Europe, in South America, in North America and even in Antarctica.

Yes, this weapon WAS used for hunting, but that is little reason to allow it to be kept in circulation.

It is also true that collectors love this weapon. Their walls are adorned with examples of these weapons from the earliest recorded use of them to the ones manufactured today.

One of this weapon's greatest assets is also its greatest danger. It can be used in so many ways to commit so many different incidences of mayhem.

As an instrument of terror, this weapon is unsurpassed in history. It can be used to frighten, to intimidate, to maim, to dismember, to cut out a heart, to behead and countless other ways.

I speak of none other than the SWORD.

There are many kinds of swords, but one of the most deadly was surely the Roman gladius (shown above).

To quote Vince's Worthwhile Website, "With their skills as soldiers and battle formations the gladius was an ideal weapon for drawing out in the tight formations that they used to march and indeed fight in.

"The Roman Gladius (Gladius; n  Lat; sword) got its origins from the Spaniards when after several conflicts the Romans became impressed with the sword and adopted it for themselves."

The Roman gladius, though, was a short little dude, and its range was therefore fairly short.

For targets further away, there were various longer swords that could be used.

People have actually made their living and gained their fame using swords.

Now there can be little doubt. The sword must be banned.
Please contact your Senator and Congressman and encourage him to introduce a bill (hopefully with no earmarks) to ban these awful WSDs (weapons of such destruction).


Ducky's here said...

Pointed weapons aren't as extreme as you portray them, Joe.

"So long as you use a knife, there's some love left."

--- Norman Mailer

Meet sarcasm with sarcasm, I say.

Joe said...

Ducky: Norman Mailer. Norman Mailer.

A sharp quote, Ducky.

Xavier Onassis said...

I'll give up my hand-and-a-half broadsword when you pry it from my cold, dead, chainmailed fist!

Joe said...

XO: We can arrange that.

Unknown said...

Joe - HA! No you can't! Because I was faking my death to lure you in close enough to gut you with my Damascus Sgian Dubh. WIN!

Sometimes jovial banter is more rewarding than intellectual debate.

Almost always, actually.

Ducky's here said...

Joe, on the matter of gun control, I'm curious if you have been following any of the commentary on the left, specifically Thom Hartmann's discussion of the 2nd amendment.

He is examining the influence of southerners and most specifically Patrick Henry, on forming the 2nd amendment as a means to ensure the protection of the militias policing slaves from Federal interference.
His sources are scholarly and I bring this up as an example that does shed light on just what "freedoms" many of the founding oligarchs were interested in preserving.
I was completely unaware of this.

I think it's a good example of how little many of us know about our history and how much of our accepted knowledge may be totally off base.
It is insidious because it is one more reminder that "states rights" is almost impossible to seperate from slavery.

Joe said...

Ducky:"..."states rights" is almost impossible to seperate from slavery."

That is a patently ridiculous statement.

States that wanted their "rights" might well have supported slavery, but the two CONCEPTS are separate and unequal.

Fredd said...

Joe, I'm with you in your quest to save lives on a massive scale.

But your proposal comes up a bit light; we should also ban the sword's predecessor: the sharp, pointy stick.

And we also need to ban the most hideous weapon before the sharp pointy stick was introduced to kill people, the insideous, horrible 'big, heavy rock.'

They are all a threat to humanity, and if we can keep swords, sharp pointy sticks and big ol' gnarly rocks out of circulation, nobody will get killed anymore.

You are onto something here, Joe, something BIG, I can just feel it....

Joe said...

Fredd: "... the sword's predecessor: the sharp, pointy stick."

I had forgotten, even though it was memorialized in the old saying, "Walk softly and carry a big pointy stick."

Truth be known said...

Joe, I have come to the conclusion that Liberals are just evil,Racism, hate, and intolerance. Liberals are stupid people and I just cannot stand dealing with them any longer. Therefore, I am no longer participating in commenting on blogs, anyone's blogs.
Thank you and goodbye, it was really nice and enjoyable in the past but it isn't any longer

Joe said...

TBK: Thanks for commenting that you would not be commenting any more.

Truth be known said...

thanks for "Trying" to be funny

I.M. Craptek said...

Aloha Akhbar, Dear Leader Obama, thank you SO much for protecting me from those Bad, Bad Guys like Rush Limbaugh, the Quick Draw McGrwan Wayne LaPierre of the NRA.
And from keeping those bad guy from getting a gun.

And by the way El Presidente, the First Lady's new hairdo is definintely an improvement.


Joe said...

I.M.C: "...And by the way El Presidente, the First Lady's new hairdo is definintely an improvement."

It would be even better it she'd put that wig on backwards.

bulbman1066 said...

Mr. Obama, you’re so eager to dispense with the 2nd amendment, I’ve got a better idea. Let’s dispense with you!

Buck Ofama said...

Let’s be honest here, President Barack Lincoln has been very negative and degrading as he puts down anything or anyone Conservative or Republican ,and sadly we have 4 more years of this all talk no action bully to put up with .

Lone Ranger said...

The most prolific murderers in the world are abortionists. More than 50 million just in this country since 1973, when abortion was legalized. That's what make me sick when the most pro-abortion president in our history talks about banning guns being worth it if it saves JUST ONE child.

Joe said...

BO: "... he puts down anything or anyone Conservative or Republican..."

He is more narrow minded than any all of the people he calls narrow minded put together.

LR: "...the most pro-abortion president in our history talks about banning guns being worth it if it saves JUST ONE child."

Save ONE child while deliberately murdering TENS OF THOUSANDS. That makes sense, doesn't it?