Monday, September 30, 2013

A New Government

I have decided to start a brand new country. Until it is firmly established, I will serve as its Benevolent Dictator. Once it is operating smoothly, I will step down in favor of a duly elected president. Trust me. 

My new country will feature a federal government that will be a vital part of the country. It will be designed to be a great unifier, to help citizens work together to build a great nation for their benefit. 

This federal government will also have a role in actually establishing justice for all citizens. It will establish a judicial system that prevents the federal government from prosecuting an accused it cannot prove committed a crime. It will hold that a person is innocent of any crime the guilt of which cannot be proven beyond a shadow of a doubt. 

Another role of my new federal government will be to keep the peace. It will be prohibited from imposing any rules and/or regulations that would lead to unrest. It will also be charged with the responsibility of actively doing those things that would lead to peaceful lives for its citizens. 

The federal government of my new country will be required to defend the nation from all outside aggression or attack. It will maintain a military that is unequaled in the world, but it will be prohibited from being involved in any conflicts around the world that cannot be definitively shown to be a threat to the nation. 

My new country will encourage people to be self-sufficient. It will do what it can to help those who cannot help themselves, but everyone else will be expected to carry his/her own weight. The government will strive to promote, but not to provide, the welfare of its citizens through the effective communication. 

The cornerstone of this new land will be liberty. The federal government will actively seek to promote freedom at every level. Wherever freedom is challenged or attacked, it will step in to ensure that its citizens enjoy the highest possible level of liberty. Except as specifically required by the constitution, the less the government does, the better. 

My new government shall have the power to impose an income tax on its citizens the amount of which is not to exceed 9% of every earned dollar over the poverty level, whether the entity being taxed is an individual or a company. It may also charge an additional tax not exceeding 3% of the net income earned on any business that buys or sells products or services in any state other than the one in which it is primarily licensed. It may tax each state in an amount not to exceed 1% of the state’s total general tax income. No other federal taxes may be levied on the citizens of the new country. 

The IRS shall have two employees, one on the computer to calculate taxes, the other to check the first one’s work. Taxes shall be filed on the computer at home or at the local library. One-half page is all it will take to complete a tax return. It will show the amount one earned minus the poverty level times the tax rate. The government may not spend more than it takes in and may own no charge cards. This government will not have the power or authority to tax property, real or personal. 

The federal government will not be allowed to run any business of any kind at any time.  The regulation of business will be restricted to those businesses that engage in buying or selling products or services in a state or states other than the one in which it they are primarily licensed. Those regulations must be agreed to by the states involved. 

The country will be divided into three branches, each with equal power to the others. There will be an executive branch whose job it will be to implement the directions provided by the second branch, congress. That congress will consist of two “houses.” One of the houses will represent the citizens directly; the other will represent the states’ governments. Representatives in each house are expected to spend enough time with the people of their districts or states to know of their concerns and how they want to be represented. Representatives in each house may serve no more than 3 years consecutively. 

All laws made by the two houses shall relate to one of the following: theft of government property, threatening or murdering a federal agent or employee, lying to a federal officer, kidnapping across state lines, cheating in a business that buys or sells products or services in any state other than the one in which it is primarily licensed and the willful destruction of federal property. All other crimes fall under the jurisdiction of the states. 

Finally, there will be a judicial branch charged with the task of evaluating the decisions being made by the other two branches. It will ensure that the decisions made conform to the new country’s constitution. It will ensure that no laws would be passed that would infringe on the liberty of the citizens. This arm of the government may not make laws by any means whatsoever. If the constitution does not speak to an issue, the judicial branch may not speak to it, nor can they speak to a matter implied; only to those matters specifically delineated in the constitution. Members of the judicial branch may not serve more than 5 consecutive years.

Oh, yes! There will be a constitution designed to prevent my new nation’s government from violating any of its intended purposes. It will be a constitution that severely limits what the government can do. In fact, it will contain specific instructions about what the government cannot do. Each branch of the government will be required not only to follow the constitution but will also be required to “ride herd” on the other branches to ensure that they, too, comply. 

The federal government of my new country will have no right to place any form of restrictions or make any laws that have anything to do with religion, speech, what people write or say, how they can meet together for whatever purpose they desire or keeping them from complaining to or petitioning the government with their concerns. The states, social groups, churches, and other entities may restrict those rights if their citizens allow them to, but the federal government will not be allowed to violate this rule. The old adage, “You can’t yell ‘Fire!’” in a crowded theater will not apply to federal laws in my new land. 

The right of the citizens of this country to keep and bear arms cannot be restricted by my new government for whatever reason. States, social groups, churches, and other entities may do as they please, but the federal government is prohibited from placing restrictions on people’s right to arm themselves.

No military, police, or any other federal entity may force a citizen to allow him/her/them to stay or reside in the citizen’s home, owned or rented, for any reason at any time.

No entity of the federal government may enter the property of any citizen without the voluntary permission of that citizen unless he has a federal warrant duly generated by, and authorized by all three branches of the federal government. The federal government may not search a citizen’s property, personal or real, or seize any item belonging to the citizen without a federal warrant duly generated by and authorized by all three branches of the federal government. It may not spy on the citizens. 

The federal government may not accuse a citizen of any crime or misdemeanor without first establishing through a grand jury that there is demonstrable probable cause to do so. The federal government may not try a person twice for the same crime. It may not require a person to testify against himself and must afford every citizen “due process” in every circumstance.

Every citizen will have the absolute right to a jury trial when accused of wrongdoing, and will have the right to face his accuser in a court of law. Every citizen will have the right to an attorney when charged by the federal government, whether or not he has the resources to pay for one himself.

The federal government of this new land will not be allowed to require excessive bail or fines, to inflict cruel or unusual punishment or to deny a citizen a right to a fair trial by an impartial jury of his peers.

The federal government may not sue its citizens. Citizens may sue the federal government only for violation of the rights named herein.

No employee of the federal government may receive a gift of any kind from any person not directly related to him or her. Anyone caught lobbying any government personnel will be tried, convicted and shot at sunrise.

The constitution of my new country will apply specifically and exclusively to the federal government. There shall be an expectation that states will develop their own constitutions that complement and follow the guidelines of the new country’s constitution, making adjustments as their citizenry sees fit.

It shall be a requirement that the federal government of this new land shall be kept as small as possible as long as it is enabled to do the tasks, and only the tasks, assigned specifically to it by its constitution. 

The major job of the president, the congress and the judiciary will be to sit around eating, talking and maybe bowling. The president may occasionally delve into international affairs, but may not commit the country to any treaty, war or police action without the expressed written consent of the congress, the judiciary, the states and the people unless the new country is attacked on its own soil, in which case the offending country’s government shall be obliterated from the face of the earth.

The preamble to the constitution of the new country I’m forming will read as follows:

We the people of the (New Country’s name), in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defense, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the (New Country’s name).

4 comments:

Ducky's here said...

Did you leave out the 14th amendment?

sue hanes said...


Joe - You have my vote.

Ducky's here said...

The right of the citizens of this country to keep and bear arms cannot be restricted by my new government for whatever reason.

------
Convicted felons can bulk purchase?
Anyone with a history of violence due to mental illness?
he profoundly insane can walk around strapped?
The blind?
Concealed carry in pre-schools?
No age requirements?

etc. etc...

You are some gun loon, Joe.

Joe said...

"Convicted felons can bulk purchase?"

They're not citizens in my new land, not until they've paid their debt and lived on the outside for ten years crime free.

"Anyone with a history of violence due to mental illness?"

Well, yeah, but only if their violence was against liberals.

"The profoundly insane can walk around strapped?"

At least in a straight jacket.

"The blind?"

Especially the blind.

"Concealed carry in pre-schools?"

Have you ever heard of a pre-schooler who committed a mass murder?

"No age requirements?"

Yep. You have to be older than 9 months gestational.